hello darling
this is yourself writing you a gentle reminder things to do before the new year (or before the end of first week of new year 
)
please remember to:
so i plunked down the money yesterday and purchased an used cargo van (12 passenger van) for transporting inventory between jobs and my warehouse. it's very scary actually, handing 10+k over to a complete stranger not to mention the added-on financial responsibility that comes with that, such as dmv, licenses, liability, insurance payments. the grown up world is really getting more and more complex every day which makes my insecurities surface from times to time. sometimes i just want to hide under my blankets and ignore everything. but i know i cannot do that. i have to take charge and change my life because no one else will do that for me.
the business is almost a year now and it has grown. we have started to attract repeat customers and start building up our cilent list. that comes with more responsibilities. i will have a lot of challenges next year:
as if i already don't spend enough time online, i have decided to write another blog. but it's different in some ways. my other blog is really about more for work purpose.
this time, it's personal.
this blog is really a personal playground. i want to be more personal (and more ranting haha) as well as having a documentation of my business endeavours. since starting the company in 2006, i have gone through many personal, emotional and business obstacles. some are just pebbles in my shoes, some made me fallen into a pit for days, some are very painful, and some are very healing. one of the things that i have learned in creating my own business is i have gradually lost myself. i have not been making time for my own and my sanity suffered from it. so this blog is my playground, my ranting, my rambling.
i am a small business owner. i am also 26 (well, just turned 26 10 days ago) and people still don't give me the respect because i don't wear business suits or i look too young. (i am sorry, heals and makeup and french manis just get in the way when i lug things around in my job). i purposely leave white hairs on my head just so maybe i would look slightly older. i also purposely don't announce how old i am when people ask, where in fact, i should be proud of the fact that i own my own business and i am under 30. none of my friends can say that. most of my school mates have 9-5 jobs (some even longer hours), spend their days sitting around office doing god knows what, then go out to a bar doing god knows what and instead of saving money for something long term, they spend it on new clothes, new purses, new shoes and new boyfriends (yes, maybe you sense a tad of bitterness in my tone of voice but i am going to get over my self pity now 
) comparing to me who works a flexible schedule and in charge of my destiny.
i often feel ashamed of my age. it's increasingly so when i speak with seniors who think i am just some silly girl spewing some silly words. i have been dealing with property management issues since i was 23. i still remember contracters who didn't take me seriously and try to take me out for drinks.
i know i am good at what i do. and i also know that true, in my profession, being a woman poses certain limitations (for example i cannot lug a sofa bed up the stairs all by myself). i am also significantly younger than most of my fellow counterparts. but please do not mistake my lack of white hairs and wrinkles as lack of abilities. my age does not measure my experiences in the field. so i am saying "no" to those nay-sayers non-believers and those darn belittlers who need to belittle someone else to make them feel bigger. i may be small, but i can scream real loud if i need to.
i am a small biz girl in a big wide world
my size may be small but i speak loudly
i speak with integrity sincerity and flexibility
i maybe young and may make mistakes
but i learn from them and i stand taller
i have nothing to fear
nothing to lose
hear me roar world, here i come!
